The heart is the body's strongest muscle.

Well, trying to hold on to the promise of 'a picture a day and not less than that' here. This is a rough sketch from my sketchbook I made while watching the film "Life Before Her Eyes", [ all about how seriously ephemeral our existence is]. But the drawing is not about that. Since I'm all over the great Gothic Revival and Poe these days, the sketch portraits the sexy barber.

And then they went and other wonders and wizards came round.

The New Year going be here soon and I'm nearly ready to go out and have fun and everything and I'm not sure what is that what I'm feeling right now.
This year has been quite a good piece of my lifetime, full of emotions and adventures and changes and new discoveries and inspirations and disappointments and sad things, there was a death that always will be hard to think about and there were some magical things that used to make my head spin and then they went and other wonders and wizards came round.
I'm exhausted. In a way. It even seems there's nothing left to feel / to feel with in my heart anymore, I'm just an empty vision heartwise, what I can't say about my mind, it works quite good and is getting through this constant visionary depression better or worse and my hands are drawing stuff all the time, and I'm looking forward the minute I'm back from all the festivities to get my hands on all the exciting things.

Everything changes.

Just found this drawing of mine finished a while ago when it was at its best in making sense. Now all the pieces are struggling to come together in my head. I thought I'd wait for the day I'd feel like giving this away to him, the day I'd wake up and my heart would feel right just like back in the early days, but the day had never come until the moment everything ended. I might be seeing him one to one for the last time today, so hopefully he accepts this as a goodbye present since it belongs to him in a way. It doesn't belong here in my room any more anyways.

The persistence of memories.

There is something like a last page of a secret book at the end of any relationship, where you can see rows of lines with hundreds of words in them each one telling a story about a moments from the whole time and hours spent together, morally and phisically.

And it does not matter how long a relationship lasts, it matters what scents, sounds, visions and memories, thoughts and moments it puts inside forvever, touches and feelings of all those seconds that remain and stay.

Diese Freudliche Idealisierung in der Liebe bringt deine Name und Gesicht in alle neue Umgange ich pflege in diesen Tagen.